coming again

i juz came back from a long journey. i've attended my friend's wedding...it is pretty much challenging as there are so many obstacles throughout the journey as my best friend from Penang who is also invited to go for the wedding have  major problems on her way to kch. somehow the obstacles have been handled professionally thanks to my family who have helped the so called "troubles. "crucial problems". i am pretty much excited to see my friend finally reaching kch, after all the obstacles she went through..all and all everything went pretty fine after tat..well its sort of an adventure to a long journey wedding ehheee... actually im looking forward to spend my night near the beach during d full moon but that wish or rather things tat i desired to do for so long cudnt come true due to the fact tat i am not tat familiar or well of the place overthere,..regardless of tat, i am pretty shocked when i was told tat the place that i stayed in is actually haunted,,,my oh my luckily i didnt get to have any kind of mysterious moments ehhehee..tats all for this entry :P

My Besday Bash 29 Nov 2011 ^_^

tqvm everyone for the wonderful besday wishes! appreciate it so much!this is one of my birthday ever! trust me! thank God for that!!! :)))

i Purposely respond to all of my great besday wisher! as to show how i appreciate all of u so muchhh!!thankss a lot!!u've made my day everyone :) MUCH LOVE FROM ME!!! Huggzzzzz.....

One of my fave part on my birthday is >>>

GambitSaifullah Gambit Saifullah 

@ 

@BelleBaharudin happy birthday dear :)

I am so happy so therefore i responded to him >>>>

BelleBaharudin Bella 

@ 

@GambitSaifullah Thank you so much! u really made my day :) gracias GS, appreciate it soooo much hehhe :))) much love <3<3<3

well well well i had juz received bad news as i was told by C.A.R he's no longer available in dat skewl next year in which makes me pretty much upset..so tat mean this year will be his last day to be seen in dat skewl, i cudnt imagine wat will happen in the near future without him. yeah i do like him, i adore him...pretty sad ya! nonsense yes it is...i cant help it..hmm..enuff said i wil juz say LET IT BE! and for tat particular boy im with now..i think im getting more against u now..i will try to get rid off u from now on. reason why: he isnt the type of guy i look forward too..sadly enuff :P i will let u go n please dont return to me again coz i am totally sick of u! quit playing games with my heart.....now my world is empty..i cudnt trust anyone anymore! not even my buddies.esp in certain topics of life...well life must go on..deal with it ya! btw i have that kind of feelings by looking at his eyes theres something lay inside :) love,Bella :)))

Nov 11, 11, 2011

hello my world of blogging..i come back again to tell d stories that happened in my life lately. To start things off, my world of working is juz getting to its end as many works settled one by one. Perhaps all i can say throughout this year i have gone through a lot which i wish will be even  more challenge in da future especially in terms of good experience in handling many sorts of circumstances. Syukur alhamdulillah i am personally proud of myself coz many contributions i have brought to my school for this year..which i dont want to list it here coz i am not the type of person who like to boast out of my achievements. Enough of mentioning that i am 85 percent satisfied with what i do, the other 15 percent i wish i can improve for the years to come.
Last nite i have my school annual dinner..Unfortunately i cudnt even got the grand prize or any lucky draw's prize..Last year i was one of the luckiest person to get it..its ok though coz at least i have got once right.be thankful of wat u have is more than enuff.
Btw regarding on my relationship with him, (my love life) hehehe i dunno how far we can go...honestly i really think it leads to nowhere coz so far our main barrier is definitely our religion.. i juz want to have someone who is able to accept my religion as i want him later on to guide me to become a good muslimah..well let's God decide it.i juz dont know wat to think of..well in my dream i always imagine the guy of my dreams..n hopefully i met someone like what i wanted it too...so for my current relationship i juz carry on though it will not be as serious as it will be coz i dont want to be brokenhearted. Whenever i see my peers settled with a new life i mean marriage i do wonder what next for me..am I able to meet someone that can propose me as his wife..ermmmm wonder again..again nothing i can do but juz hope n pray that God wil let me meet the one that is fated to be with me..one and only my forever soulmate..Now I juz want to focus what i need first which is a stable work life then only i think about the next one which is marriage...well lets see how it comes...May my life will be as smooth as the beach breeze....hehehe..k thats all from me for this 11 nov 11 entry.gOD bless! :)

Counting the days before it finally reaches to d big day that I have waited all my life..that very day.hopefully it is not juz like an empty promises given by d gov for the sake of "ambil hati" d rakyats.btw i dont wanna talk about politics overhere juz want to share something out of my ordinary days. i went to s.serapee sengaja spelling salah takut org pergi search kat google dpt plak org baca my blog gewdness kelas kau belle hahahahaa :p kidding. i am so glad to c my two nephews giggling, laughing loud out from their lungs enjoying themselves..i knw its been quite sometime i didnt got to spend time with them. 2days before i brought them to watch cinema which again makes them pretty much delighted.as an aunty i juz can give wat i can, i love them so much.i cudnt bother anything else except for their happiness, i wil try my very best to let them grow and become somebody insyaALLAH, though at this time around i didnt do much on their studies, not that i didnt feel concern but its not easy to teach small kids...kenyataan ! thats the fact.maybe becoz i am not patient enuff coz many things bothering me on my mind until i could hardly focus and spend my entire hours on them..thats my weaknesses though..tats all from me ya..dont want to blurted out so much..wil save some other stories in my next entry! love ya u know who u r :P muach muach!! xoxoxoxoxo

aku yg mengejar byg cinta
kian terbiar
terpendam kata
tak terungkap
selamanya

pedihnya hanya aku yg merasa
mahu memilikinya
aku hanya hamba cinta

bisik hatiku
lepaskan dirinya
sungguh aku tak bisa
biarlah ku sendiri
tanpa kasih di hati

aku tak mampu
pertahankan lg
cinta yg menyakiti
biarlah aku pergi
tiada hampa di hati

wat more to say..one of my happiest moment in life :)

glennalinskie Glenn Alinskie 

Hahahah!! Little things in life that makes me happy..☺RTBelleBaharudin: glennalinskie Happy 4 u!! Gamers n toys addicted hehe...:) >>> 13 october 2011 Hugzzz!!

bUSy Busy life

i am ultimately busy with my life...though i am busy i wil treat myself with wandering around the town to release stress..yup i am stress but luckily i have my buddy to be with me, each and everyday..yup i met him again lately.he is rather cute in his own way..he makes me happy everyday...i miss him so dearly :(

syawal stori3s

well today i went to apiz af open house. yeah i enjoyed it so much...besides apiz i met daus too..they are cute boys n love to see them act n jokes whch makes me to laugh laugh and laugh :) hmm..yesterday i went to cikgu J house, a day before that went to my lec's houses..to my suprise i am actually went to my scariest lec in my faculty..she was so happy perhaps coz she was juz adopted new baby after very long of waiting.

tonite my frens wil come and visit me,tell u d truth my working mode is still at 0 KM/Hour. Hows tat? i am pretty much worried of myself...why am i so lazy to start my work, it is depends on my mood. i hate Monday class..feels like i am tochering myself instead of tutoring........hmmmmm.......so pissed when my mind start to think of it......got to go now.wanna sleep for a while :) gudnite peeps xoxo Muach zillion times :)

wow

Salam its the 26th days of ramadhan month, i am writing this blog juz want to jot down some memories that had happened to me yesterday and i will continue to drag the stories that happen to me today. Well i am so lucky and happy as being the chosen one to go for a short interview thru the radio station. it was rather a big shocked news the first time i received the news from my colleagues. the first time experience was rather cool though.cant believe that i am actually doing it. 

Second thing that makes me doubles up happy is tat my book is coming up! :)

wat if i dont wanna face 2mrw

rain drops keep falling on my head
But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turnin' red
Cryin's not for me
'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'
Because I'm free
Nothin's worryin' me

So I just did me some talkin' to the sun
And I said I didn't like the way he got things done
Sleepin' on the job
Those raindrops are fallin' on my head, they keep fallin'

praying time

im on my way for tarawih + solat hajat for pmr, spm n stpm students. it wil start at 6 now still have few more minutes before i drive to my school. alhamdullillah i have received good news about my future, i cant wait to be one of the permanent employees soon. school are pretty much challenging to me lately especially i have difficulties in understanding, spending enuff time to do all the preparations. somehow i am trying my best though at times i admit i am not doing my verybest out of it..but each and everyday i pray to God that He will help me out to do things...insyaALLAH i believe I must double up my efforts as to let  the flow of my teachings will be much more smoother..watever it is i hope Allah will forgive me especially in every wrongs i do from the day i was born til now.amin.thats all from me.gotta catch the school in a bit.wasalam xoxoxo

2 in 1:Happy + Sad

i am so happy coz finally i've got the opportunity to look into his eyes tat i adore so much. he was a shy guy indeed.perhaps i was overjoyed as if god listen to me.everytime i wish if only he walks pass me by..then without expecting at all. he walks then he talked to me..i really like to see him again and again he is such an inspiration for me to work imagine how lonely i am without anyone beside me. yeah AR u r such a lovely guy.

Sad, G.s saddened me. i dislike the fact tat he had condemned everyone who wears jilbab n said everygal who wears it doesnt deserve to wear it. juz want him to let him know we r human too.doesnt mean we wear it and we are free from doing sins..that is such a shallow minded of him..i am very much upset of wat he had said.ok like wat i have write on my blog sincerely me as a human being..normal being..but little that i want to act beyond the line that God has put as the guide of muslims.. i wear it coz i know Allah ask me to wear it, n i will limit everything i do in a way tat i must control myself from doing many social things that of coz against my religion. i know wat i want to do, apart from being like a typical human..i wil do like other humans do.but not to the extend it is against my religion tat's it..

hmmm...mix feeling of mine ...........

i sincerely think i become someone "cold" now..i dont like to talk to anyone like before..i rather live my own life.it is juz tat i think i want to be all alone..wat i want now is only GOD, my family and few friends only..sorry peeps whoever think i act so differently coz tats wat i am..blame me for being "cold".. well everything has got its reason..i turned to be cold because of something that needless for me to explain :)

ignorance is a bliss...mind u!

its near to ramadhan..i still remember last year he used to be my loyal companion on killing da time of breaking the fast..now that i missed him so dearly and he is not around.how i wish i can get rid of him..but i simply cant. i will try my best to ignore him.yeah i am so hurt now.i really am.....whenever i miss him is it going to be a worth effort or juz a waste of junk. pitied myself for slaving my heart for someone like him. gudnite ceng bla bla2...crazy mode..sebelll banget! :(

today im listening to tilawah alquran thru utube..i felt deeply connected and near to God which makes my tears fall down..i had inner peace each time i hear surah Al-Quran.by listening to other ppl's reciting it makes me even humble, i stil remember when the moments i spent my time to join usrah in matrics i am one of the ahli surau..i love it so much..thank Allah of choosing me to get thru it..i know i am not perfect but i wil try my best to become someone better for U my dearest ALLAH, the most GRACIOUS AND MERCIFUL :)  subhanallah, alhamdulillah wala illah haillah lallah ALLAHU AKBAR !! LOVE U ALLAH..TIL MY SOUL APART FROM MY BODY..I WILL OWEZ LOVE YOU!AMIN YA ALLAH :)

for the past 2-3 days i had a major headache.my life was suffer..i cudnt manage to control my worries, there is no inner peace in me..it was bad bad bad..i dont appreciate the moment i breathe in this world coz my life was miserable enuff..luckily i have god to let me calm down. coz i know he knows wats been bothering me all the while..i dont know how far i wil go.i juz hope i can be better each n everyday.nothing else i expect but the best wish for my students and their future.i am deeply concern on that, though sometimes i juz think that nothing else i can do to help them..i only seek for God's faith in me.if he believes i can do it then i wil do it for him, but in order to let me keeps on doing it, i want Him to be behind me all the time.who says wat im doing is easy..its a big NEVER esp to the newbie like  me..ALLAH thank u coz u give me the courage, though at times i wil lose my mind..i cudnt handle the pressure that exert on me..hopefully things wil be better in da future..i wil give my very best to overcome the unknown future..hopefully..MAY happiness be with me alwiz insyaALLAH..for the rest of ma life xoxoxo :) Love Bella Alinskie :D

Addicted to this song :)

Ku sedar ku tak seberapa
Jika dibanding mereka
Yang jauh lebih megah dari diri ini

Apa yang mampu ku berhias
Hanyalah hati yang ikhlas
Terpendam simpan untuk dia yang sudi

Mencintai aku dengan seadanya
Mencintai aku bukan kerana rupa
Dalam waktu sedu
Dalam waktu hiba
Ku harapkan dia rela

Mencintai aku dengan seadanya
Sanggup menerima insan tak sempurna
Atau mungkin cinta sebegitu hanya
Kisah dongeng saja

Belum pernah ku merasakan
Dipeluk dalam dakapan
Eratnya melindungi jiwa rapuh ini

Sanubariku memerlukan
Kehadiran seorang teman
Tulus mencurah kasih sepenuh hati

Mencintai aku dengan seadanya
Mencintai aku bukan kerana rupa
Dalam waktu sedu
Dalam waktu hiba
Ku harapkan dia rela

Mencintai aku dengan seadanya
Sanggup menerima insan tak sempurna
Atau mungkin cinta sebegitu hanya
Kisah dongeng saja

someone gave me wat s/y/g n c/i/n/t/a really is?

One of my best buddy said, in her own perspectives she think tat syg is more meaningful as compared to chinta. coz ppl may say that they chinta but sooner or later when things arent as smooth in a relationship  the one that we chinta wil simply go, in comparison with if ppl said tat they syg us, in a longer term they did syg n without leaving n left u hurt..yeah juz want to say tat i syg him so much..i really am ngee :D

Prezzie that I received from MY lovely DAD n Form 6 students :)

My very first musical box given to me by my beloved daddy..yippee..feels like im 12 years of age again lol!!

i wil never forget one of my greatest moments in life with form 6 students..gonna miss all of u so dearly :"(

very much frustrated

lately it seems to me my fate is so bad to me..everything seems to be so cruel.not tat i am a negative person but tat is what my true life is all about.today d so called clerk said to me tat my salary didnt come out again..come on it is my last day yet i didnt get paid..i am deeply hurt and annoyed..the fact that i want to purchase things that i always wanted has to be postponed. apart from tat, i need to settle my work which i have no energy n vibes to do it yet..owh gewdness when will d happiness come to me again..its like my blog has been bombarded with so many negativity towards life. pathethically that is what i am all about the one who cant stop complaining n whining  about the journey of my life. nobody are willingly to hear my voice within where else i want to blurted out except from my dearest diary so called blog. got to go now juz want to share the unhappiness tat happened to me each and everyday..god bless me insyaALLAH :(

another day

its been awhile i'd gone away with my busy called life..though i am suppose to do my revision but i juz want to drop by something on my blogs. i juz want to express the feelings i felt lately of course nothing else I MISS HIM..i really do...of all the guys i met d only one tat stayed in my mind is HIM.i dunno wat kind of spell he had send to me but that is really bothering me now..i cudnt stop letting him off my mind..i wondered if he feels the same way too..which i wish he did :( i dunno wat so special about him well that is why ppl used to call it love is beerrrrLIND hehee..gosh..i want to get rid off him but i cant i really cant..how i wish we never met..tat is the best solution i suppose..i want him to know tat i do really miss him so much..it kills me inside so deep...nothing can make me happy coz the hole inside my heart is only can be fix by u BM..i missed our old memories..when everything seems to be so heavenly now its gone.u r far away from me...i did wish u on ur besday how i wish i can spent it with u but again tat was impossible..try to be delightful somehow it is still lack of the wonderful vibes tat i owez expected...k tats all from me...dear BM if u bumped into me again dont let our past memories juz fades away.i mis u so dearly n i hope we can be together n support each other although we r distant away.i love u so much BM i really am :(

WIF my cuzzie :)

Your Sun is in Sagittarius in the Sagittarius decanate and quadrant.

The ruler of your Sun in Sagittarius is Jupiter. Jupiter is jovial, optimistic, idealistic, and philosophical. Born in the first decanate, you have a hearty sense of humor and fun, yet you seek to learn about the big picture so that you are not merely fun and games.

Sagittarius, the Archer

Sagittarius has a lively personality and is an optimist. Considered one of the most fun-loving signs of the zodiac, Sagittarians are direct, forthright, and sometimes completely tactless as they say exactly what they’re thinking! This can be seen as refreshing honesty, or bluntness, depending on the audience. Sagittarius is restless and inquisitive, and often will make quick jaunts impulsively just for a change of scenery. Constantly seeking out something new and stimulating, Sagittarians often have another goal in mind even before they accomplish the first. Sagittarius is naturally questioning and interested in the big picture, and can be quite philosophical or opinionated.

Planet: Jupiter; Element: Fire; Quality: Mutable; Color: Purple; Day: Thursday; Stone: Turquoise; Part of Body Ruled: Liver and hips; Motto: I philosophize; Energy: Yang


You are funny, articulate, and extremely intuitive. You love to make people laugh, and come across as fun and charming, if a little sarcastic. You have a strong sense of responsibility and worry about the future more than the typical Sagittarius personality. However, your sense of fun always comes shining through. You like to stay informed and on top of things. When you’re not “in the know” you could find you are less confident. Learning about anything and everything is a life-long hobby.




You were born on the 29th day of the month, which reduces to a 2. Extremely intuitive, you are a true dreamer. At your best, you are inspired. However, the tendency to worry or over-think can be present. 



Factoring in the 11th month of November, you are a number 4, suggesting that you are not the typical happy-go-lucky Sagittarius. You are more concerned about the future and more responsible than many people born under this fiery, outgoing sign. Factoring in your birth year gives you your Birth Path Number—a highly personal number for you.     

The card associated with your birthday is the Four of Hearts. You are an intuitive person who is also grounded and responsible. Very self-expressive, you may be a little shy at first but quickly warm up and have many interesting stories to tell. Perceptive and tuned in, you thrive on close contact with others. Your love card is the Two of Spades, indicating that you are very idealistic in love, and think the world of your partner. You may work with a partner, and certainly appreciate stability and practicality in any partnership. You need a solid, steadfast, and reliable partner/lover.

When d night falls, d emotions come knocking

When the night falls, the emotions come knocking.the fact that the 

emotions used to run at its highest during the night time. 

Perhaps, that’s when the minds r clearer and our soul-searching 

moment starts getting wild .

And it’s nights like these that make me cave into confession of 

loneliness. I know I am not literally alone with so many loved ones 

around, it’s just the emotions taking me over…Hate this situation

hmmm..mind you.

i hate the fact that human being have this kind of feeling which 

couldnt be controlled once it started to collapse our mind and soul.

spreading all the untold reasons..for it to simply happen without 

prior notice...thats where all the past memories dugs out from the 

grave yard all over again..regrets..unspeakable secrets,past scars 

that left within us..:"(